12/25/2008 The Last Gas Station Christmas EVER

Perhaps it is my discontent towards the job. The extra long holiday shift and the double to follow it in 18 hours. The anxiety of wondering how much more abuse they'll lay on me before I devote the majority of my time to drinking and studying.

Whatever element or elements mentioned above, throw in the decadent customers, and for the first time, I feel the emotion of jealousy towards those who have Christmas off.

Out of principle, I would not mind working the holiday or any religious holiday for that matter. No, I did not sell God out for time and a half, but religious events should not justify a commercial shut down.

With that being said, I assume you understand my feeling towards Hobby Lobby, so I will not go into my rant that they close on Sundays because right wing Christians feel that they have to limit the days that we can truly be creative thus lessening independent thought and our Jewish friends from converting us.

All I have to say about Hobby Lobby is that Sunday was always my day off (work five days, wrestle Saturday), why must I be left feeling like the speaker of an Anne Plath poem because of it.

To protest the Hobby Lobbyists, I stood behind the fuel desk pleasantly on December 25, 2008, and treated the customers to the most courteous service I could offer. Sadly, this day was also the first day the shopping baskets at Super Pantry ever saw any use.

And I decided that if I was to run out of ink writing this blog, I will drag the next customer over the counter, slice off the top of their index finger, and deliver this Pulitzer hopeful in blood.

Gas stations need to be open on Christmas for four reasons: Gas, Smokes, Newspapers, and Batteries.

Read the rest of these stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.

A Possible Cause for My Lack of Intellectual Activity

Current mood: angsty

I've recently deprived my yearning to entertain the community. With the thoughts that I had a rekindled wrestling career proven false, what is the point of pursuing other creative outlets?

That sounds better than my not keeping up with my blogs because I don't want to make the trips to Target to refill my anti anxiety meds. Not because of the cost of the pills. But because they always have some kind of special on Pokemon cards or DVDs...or hair products. I just can't afford to allow myself to act out of impulse while on unemployment.

And the inability to act impulsively has sent my alcohol tolerance to great lows. It's a struggle knowing that I can no longer finish a fifth by 4 am, and still be ready to handle the pains of existence regardless of the hangover.

So I guess, I often find myself in the position of choosing between my identity and my sanity. All of this stems from being a slave to a conglomerate. So DOWN WITH TARGET.

Sadly, I have to retract that statement after opening the offer for $30 in gift cards. And where else can I go for reasonably priced meds? Is it a conspiracy between What-Ever-The-Fuck-Mart and the psychiatrists to keep us ill, or should I just take another Ativan and Trazadone cocktail and stop worrying?