Capitalistic Pissings or Who’s Your Toilet?

A popular re-post bulletin (MySpace) seems to be the, "Why must we piss and moan while Shaniqua/Bubba does not."

Well, I think that is a little more clever than THIS IS SO TRUE AND IS BULLSHIT or Fucking Sick. Sorry to pick on any posters out there, but most of these posters expect attempts for me to come up with some creative genius. As I said, this was an attempt.

Was my long-winded nature worth the attempt. Damn, I never thought my literate nature could be so punishing.

So, what I want to discuss is why the MySpace community seems to have taken a right wing approach to welfare abuse.

Hate to be the one to break this to Tom and his millions upon millions of friends, the people who are being discussed in these bulletins probably do not have the means to find out what we are saying. If they do, then they must be going to the public library.

Read the rest of this blog at Main Event of the Dead dot Com and determine if my experiences, satires and movie knowledge makes a great base to produce a Pro-Wrestling Zombie Comedy B-Movie.

Bradgelina, Britney, and Your Kids: They need to earn their keep.

Current mood: productive

For all you parents who wake your kids up before they can have the American Dream:

Why don't you move to New York and rent out your infants to needy celebs. Just for premiers and stuff, so it would only be a one night a week gig.

Help some entertainers in custody battles. If they can take care of the "niece," why not Sean Preston?

Check out the rest of this blog at Main Event of the Dead dot Com and let me know if my humor and movie knowledge can translate into a Pro-Wrestling Zombie comedy.

Boots are for snow. Not dumb bitches.

Current mood: tired (The Lost Details of Myspace)

"Don't sit there because there because of the vent, the air it blows makes it too cold."

No, this is not a commentary about the lack of adequate heating in state-funded college establishments. This is a commentary about snow boots as fashion.

Yes, I know when you think young coeds, you think fluffy. Maybe not, but fluffy is associated with cute, and college chicks are cute.

Perhaps cute isn't the right word. The barely legal damsels are usually hot. No, I think cute is the right word. With the knowledge most teenagers gain from high school, and the social discouragement of the female quest to become wise, the air-headed comments released from the second hole can either be pitiful, or responded with, "Oh..cute."

Out of curiosity girls, what is the orifice order?

So fluffy equals cute.

Now that that is established, it seems that more than just for these young women wear fluffy winter boots. Except that they wear them when it's forty degrees out.

Check out the rest of this blog at Main Event of the Dead dot Com and let me know if my humor and movie knowledge can translate into a Pro-Wrestling Zombie comedy.

What the French Revolution taught us, and how it applies to the Hiltons

Let's face it, reality sucks.

We have people turning down second dates for $40. Are these "Nexters" telling me the dater is going to suddenly become cheap because MTV is not footing the bill? I hope the dater signed on knowing they better step up.

It would also be much better reality if we did not find it necessary to house train the most evil representations of femininity by those who cannot stop their dogs from defecating all over their houses and decrepit rock stars.

This reality allows Presidents who can get away with perjury while Lil' Kim gets time. It is a reality where saying, "bomb, bomb, bomb, Iran," is taken way too seriously.

Worst of all is the fact we have banks to rescue while decadent aristocracies can still stand. If we want to bail out our economy and end the bull shits that are the Gotties, Kardashians, and Hiltons, we must vote for Barrack Obama. This is our chance to dabble into a workable socialism. One that seemed to be a great success during the Fren...I mean Freedom revolution.

Let it be known Paris, you won't just earn yourself a new esteemless cling on forever, but now a new BMF to contend with. He is RUSS: OF THE MANY LAST NAMES (Si is my latest Chinese one, thank you Illinois Central College).

Read the rest of these stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.

America Keeps...

Current mood: argumentative

Who to be pissed off at today? America's Got Talent? The "Circus Girls" act I caught as I was trying to set up my Wii Motion Plus left me a bit upset.
Are contortionists talented...yes, but if you were Vegas talented, you should be representing the US team in London in three years. It's called Rhythmic Gymnastics. What? You can't stay that flexible for another three years?

Hell, those girls are just messing up Title 9 for us guys. Illinois State University which I would rather have wasted my education than attend (it's tough enough considering reapplying at U of I since the straight A, wrestling team captain who made sure the Illini's eventual washout tackle passed computer programming was turned down), could reinstate their folk-style wrestling program if women would rather have an education than fame. From the perspective of those observing me over the past nine (going on 10) years, they'll tell you that the quest for fame and fortune just isn't a good move.

Especially when either a producer or the Hoff is going to encourage you to take short cuts to fame.

Read the rest of this blog other stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.