Caucasia, it isn't a country and it people can't be proud of it.

I received this bulletin a few days ago (I haven't checked my MySpace in a while), and was pretty offended by it's rant about how whites have a right to be racist.

Here's a sample:

- You pass me on the street and sneer in my direction.

- You call me "Cracker", "Honkey", "Whitey" and even "The Man" and you think it's OK.

- But when I call you, "nigger", "Kike", "Towelhead", "Sand-nigger", "Camel Jockey", "Beaner" or "Chink" you call me a racist.

If you actually take these terms to heart, what the fuck is wrong with you? Overly sensitive assholes.

The fact of the matter is, no one should be calling any race by any term that they find offensive. Actually, if I call you something that really offends you (and it's not true, that's why I'll never back down from calling Alex Larson, NGW's promoter, a cowardly, lying asshole), tell me to never call you it again.

Read the rest of this blog and what is the inspiration behind my B-movie pro-wrestling zomcom, Main Event of the Dead at MainEventoftheDead.com

Honkee Hatin Haiku

Current mood: morose

I apologize if the word choice offends you. I was trying to show that obscenity towards others reflects poorly on my race. That we really are all the same, so why curse others. I am sorry that I got to use the words that fit the poem structure.

A moment of genius or I am the insensitive bastard that my Creative Writing instructor thinks I am?

Check out the rest of this blog at Main Event of the Dead dot Com and let me know if my humor and movie knowledge can translate into a Pro-Wrestling Zombie comedy.

Smoke on this Illinois

To call me a cynic would be redundant. With that being my nature, I'm indeed skeptical about the health risk of second hand smoke.

The smog clouds in LA and Mexico City are not caused by people lighting up tobacco products. It is from industrial pollution, motor vehicles, and quite possibly the Mexican community lighting their farts.

Hey, if I was part of the Hispanic race which is associated with excessive flatulence, I know that's what I'd be doing. That's what I'd think about so called patriots and their illegal border patrol.

Of course, the Lady Liberty only wants the hungry, weak, and huddled masses. She says nothing about the gassy.

Discussing farts brings me to the main point of my argument. I have yet to see a cigarette set off a Carbon Monoxide monitor.

On two separate occasions, after eating two pounds of Gardner's mild wings, my brother's unconscious farting set off our house's CO detector. He may have been twelve years-old at the time.

Until I heard the beeps, I was in a deep sleep of rare occurrence. Perhaps the fumes were consuming me. My brother did not wake to the noise, so he may have been near death. If it was not for me rushing to our bedroom door to release the gas, it may have resulted in his demise. I cannot help but wonder what kind of danger we would have faced if he had a tongue for spicier foods.

Now that we established that cigarettes are truly only dangerous to the user, why must we have a smoke-free Illinois?

Read the rest of this blog at Main Event of the Dead dot Com and determine if my experiences, satires and movie knowledge makes a great base to produce a Pro-Wrestling Zombie Comedy B-Movie.

Monday, 10/27/2008 ---- What’s with white pride?

Current mood:  restless

"Whose bright idea was it to change the logo of Peoria? It's fitting right now."

Fitting right now? What is it suppose to represent? The cultural genocide many paranoid Americans want to see repeated on the Islamic world?

Is it not enough that White Americans took away their land and kept their names? They must have their image too?

Read the rest of this blog at Main Event of the Dead dot Com and determine if my experiences, satires and movie knowledge makes a great base to produce a Pro-Wrestling Zombie Comedy B-Movie.

Renaming the Friday after Turkey Day or Screw them Smurfs

Current mood:  bitchy

I ask you, am I overly influenced by Kevin Smith's material? The psycho ex girlfriend would say no since I had not got around to reading the diary of his she bought me (in my defense, it is called "My Boring Ass Life"). Stef would say, "surprised you did not ask anyone to have sex with the corpse of Mr. Crispy," since that is the only box left unchecked on the list of what events have happened at both the Morton Travel Center and the Quick Stop.

Regardless of how much influence the Jersey boy has, Kevin Smith's latest film left me pondering something. A side from what happened in the four minutes I missed due to a flawed reel change.

With the election of Obama, should we still call Black Friday...Black Friday? Or is Obama not black enough to encourage such change?

In this politically correct world, some would say it's okay since it is not called Porch Monkey Friday (god I don't want to envision what dumb white people would do to celebrate it...it sounds like a good excuse for some fried ch...), but people do associate themselves with a color.

We know that to be true since whites do not want to be referred to as caucs. So if we are going to associate colors to negative days (discounts do not make the horrors positive), lets find one that a race does not take pride in their skin tone.

Read the rest of this blog other stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.

It's FUBAR not FUBU

I could have just copied and pasted my review for "Slumdog Millionaire", but I'd rather save that in case the Illinois Central College newspaper doesn't print it. For entertainment sake, I'll wait to see if I get to destroy The Harbinger over their disrespect towards fine writing and Hindi actors.

The suggestion of mocking Aretha Franklyn's hat at the inauguration was interesting, but it almost seems redundant to state how most black fashion is closer to FUBAR than FUBU. Of course, in an effort to stay fair and balanced, I got to defend this statement.

At least white people stopped with Tie-Dye.  Honkees also care enough to pay for the licenses to pro sport teams.  Montages of city names in letter jacket patch format with sport balls just seems tacky.

For a Cubs fan, it is embarrassing to see the Afrocentric knock off gear. The Cubby Bear look-a-likes seem to have came straight out of Hanna Babbeara's Special Laffalympics.

Horrid fashion statement shows that I can restrain my violent urges. When I saw a guy with a Cubs away cap with a straight bill, size sticker on the top of the bill, and worn to the side, I was able to prevent myself from killing the guy.

Read the rest of this blog other stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.